Oliver Willis

U.S. Men’s Soccer Captain Tells Wife: “Okay, But I Did Put Down The Toilet Seat Cover”

Clint Dempsey

The captain of the United States men’s soccer team reacted to the women’s team winning the 2015 World Cup by reminding his wife that he “regularly puts down the toilet seat cover.”

In the closing minutes of the U.S. Team’s 5-2 victory over Japan, forward Clint Dempsey reportedly told his wife Bethany that he was definitely “impressed” by the success of the women’s team, it was unfair to make a direct comparison to the men’s team failed 2014 campaign for the World Cup.

“Sure, yes, they scored five goals while we only scored once against Belgium,” he said, “But on the other hand, I’m certain the last time I went to the bathroom I put down the toilet seat cover. Maybe.”

A spokesperson for Dempsey said, “a direct comparison of the three championships for the women and none for the men” was unfair because of “reasons.” The spokesperson added, “Mr. Dempsey definitely put the toilet seat cover down. The record is clear. Probably.”