Oliver Willis

Attn PC Police: Can’t A White Guy Have Some Hot Takes?

By Randall Dibney III, Senior Contributor to Policy: The Journal of Policy

Okay, hippies, put down the hackey-sack for a second and listen to some uncomfortable truths that I, a white guy, am about to lay down for you.

I admit that I’m not “cool.” I concede I may not “get it.” I realize that I may be “belittling your opinion from a position of hundreds of years of structural racist power distribution.” But I don’t care because I just came back from the hot take kitchen with a hot take right out of the hot take oven.

Can’t a white guy have an opinion in America anymore? Guess not, according to the jackbooted thugs who operate the P.C. Police nowadays.

Specifically, can’t a white guy be amazingly dismissive about the closely held opinions of a group of ethnic minorities, some of of whom may even be gay or transgender, without getting so much crap from you people about it?

It’s like you don’t want to hear a white guy go on and on about what its like to be white in America in 2015, as if you’ve heard that same song and dance with the same old notes for decades and decades and somehow tire of its repetition.

Now remember, while my truth bombs may be getting praise from right wing nutjobs and other whites in the same elitist circles I am (shout out to my New Republic homies), don’t let this cast any doubt on the idea that I’m a liberal. I have a bicycle and NPR tote bag and everything. I’m not like those neanderthals at all, even though my argument is nearly verbatim what they’ve been saying for decades.

I say what I say after having defensively noted that I voted for Obama, as if to insulate myself from offering a tired old excuse for once again trying to limit the sphere of acceptable conversation.

It reminds me of a discussion I once had with Joe Scarborough over some sponsored lattes during a commercial break on the set of Morning Joe, but that was off the record except for the part where I casually note I am an acquaintance of a mid-tier cable television host.

Aren’t you lot always going on about giving a voice to the voiceless? Well I’m white, I’m male, and it’s about time – at last, America – where I am given a forum to air my grievances and hot takes without having my beliefs questioned.

Let me explain it to you, as a minority and/or woman, about how the world works: I talk and you listen while nodding your head emphatically in agreement.

Glad we could get this all sorted out. Remember, I’m white, and I matter.